The resident teenager says, “Mom, you take Facebook comments way too seriously.” Not exactly sure why he says that–I operate under the assumption that my Facebook friends (most are age peers) are not that much into sensationalism (with the possible exception of Andy 
) and, thus, will state their activities and their hearts truthfully and in all sincerity.
I jotted this post title in the margin of my journal a couple of weeks ago. Not sure where it came from. But I know I was thinking about being real. I am happy that in recent days of following my Facebook friends in the brief insights given by their daily posts I’ve learned: a friend is engaged; one has given birth to a beautiful baby girl; one’s spouse is recovering well from surgery; some are happy about new job opportunities; a few are reacting and recommending actions in light of the current state of politics and the economy; many celebrated Easter with great joy and gratitude; some are paying their taxes today; and my daughter needs a babysitter (a need creatively described as an invitation to a play date with the Granddaughter).
In recent months, I have stood on the sidewalk of Facebook Street, earnestly praying in silence, watching friends tenderly, lovingly see a dear mother and grandmother through her final days on earth. I have listened along the way to the roller coaster emotions of friends who believe God has called them to a mission and who wonder about the roadblocks they face. I hear the hopes and fears expressed by soon-to-be-graduates and persistent job-seekers as they face the unknown NEXT.
Back in the days of hand-written letters that were delivered to mailboxes by mailmen (that was in the days before they were “letter carriers”), one would occasionally get a letter that required “reading between the lines”. The rare friend whose letters described “living”, not just “life”, still had times when the words written didn’t say it all. The in-tune heart was required to “read between the lines”–to see, to hear, to feel what wasn’t explicitly stated.
Today, we communicate our lives in one- or two-line statements–sometimes in even less as we IM or text. How are we meant to be taken by those who “listen”? Do we want our readers to take our statements at face(book) value? Do we long for someone to “read between the lines”? Are we transparent enough to weep on Facebook? (Is Facebook the place for it?…that’s another post, I think…)
…Just wondering…
Interesting post, Amy. I’ll look forward to your post about weeping on Facebook.
Amy,
You have such a lovely approach to writing – it all seems to just flow from one word to the next.
Thanks for sharing as always. I know that I tire of all of the negativity expressed in some status updates, but some people are 1) pessimists 2) hurting in some way and express the primary emotion of pain as the secondary emotion of anger (thank you to current college classes for teaching me about such things) and/or 3) venting frustration 4) etc. 5) who knows…? I just choose to focus on the “happier” updates and put that content into my “inside basket.”
Hi, Amy.
I have to second Emily’s comment. You do have a lovely approach to writing. And to life. So far, I have only read a few of your posts on this blog, but I appreciate your self-reflection and insight.
Yes, we can weep on Facebook, probably more comfortably than we can in a room full of our friends but I don’t know if we receive the same level of comfort from our friends on Facebook.
I have feeling of casual eaves-dropping on that specific social application. Sometimes, I throw in a comment, much like I do at a family reunion. (At my family reunions where everyone seems to be talking at once and throwing comments into conversations as they pass by.) Then, every now and then, something strikes me to the core, a sense that someone needs more than a quick comment and I send a private message to them.
Which, for some reason, leads me to a story. Many years ago, I was with my uncle at lunch and we saw a friend of his. He asked her, “How are you?”
She said, “It’s a dead horse day.”
“Wow, you must be having an awful day,” I said. “What happened?”
“One of our horses died,” she replied. After which she explained the sad event quite matter-of-factly.
We all have our different experiences and we share our immediate experience/thought in an update. Some of us our more willing to give details, some of us more willing to explore what that comment means, some of us are more open to weeping in the cocktail party atmosphere that is Facebook. (I like that cocktail party analogy which a reader of The Weekly Standard wrote in a letter responding to an article about Facebook.)
I should go back and read my own FB updates and think about how I may be presenting myself on a daily/hourly basis to my friends.
Take care!